It is Feb. 28 and I go to work in the morning and put my house in order. I leave soon after noon and am at Dr. de Paredes soon after.
We do another round of mammograms. I wonder whether I am radioactive yet? That went well enough ... didn't feel like punching anyone out. It's such a bloody painful process that you wonder why hasn't anyone invented something that doesn't hurt so bloody much? Did I say bloody twice in one sentence? That's because mammograms hurt like the devil. However, they save your lives, so take lots of ibuprofen, grit your teeth, cry if you have to, think ugly thoughts, but just do it!
Little did I know what was coming next ...
For the actual needle localization process ... I had to lay on my side on the bed with my breast clumped in the machine and not move an inch so that the marked breast would be exactly where it needed to be for Dr. de Paredes to perform the procedure. I had a nurse pushing on my back to keep me in place while Dr. de Paredes did the needle localization. To put it mildly, that was not a very comfortable process. You try having a wire needle inserted in your breast and see if you feel no pain.
The wire that hung outside the breast was taped to me and then I went on my way to eat my last meal before midnight. I had not anticipated not being able to take a last shower before surgery ... a sponge bath it will have to be.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Friday, February 18, 2011
West Palm Beach Feb 18 - 26
We decided to drive to WPB because I was not getting in any germ-infested airplane cabin! I have been meticulously avoiding sick people and crowds. I want to be able to keep my surgery date. I want this thing out of me as soon as possible!
We broke up our long drive in Lumberton, NC, and that was probably the last time I had access to a computer and could check on FB ... it probably was a good thing. That thing can get addictive. It is always good to take a break.
It's good to finally arrive in WPB and to see everyone. Jim is there and Aunt Lynn as well. She has gotten me a bright pink Hope Watch ... I love it! I will wear it in the hope that there will soon be a cure for this crappy cancer.
WPB is fun ... I get to see Cathy and Jess. The weather is lovely and it is good to just hang out. We do a little shopping, stop at Hoffman's for boxes of choclate, walk on the beach, hang out by the pool. We celebrate John and Jimmy's birthdays again with yummy cake from Publix and have lunch at the Olive Garden.
Oh, yes, there was work too! Budgets and subscriptions to discuss and a whole ton of stuff that make our library world go round and round.
All too soon the week was up and we had to come home ... back to the reality of what was waiting. Sarah has not destroyed our house but she has broken the clothes dryer. I do another round of cleaning because soon I won't much feel like cleaning anything.
We broke up our long drive in Lumberton, NC, and that was probably the last time I had access to a computer and could check on FB ... it probably was a good thing. That thing can get addictive. It is always good to take a break.
It's good to finally arrive in WPB and to see everyone. Jim is there and Aunt Lynn as well. She has gotten me a bright pink Hope Watch ... I love it! I will wear it in the hope that there will soon be a cure for this crappy cancer.
WPB is fun ... I get to see Cathy and Jess. The weather is lovely and it is good to just hang out. We do a little shopping, stop at Hoffman's for boxes of choclate, walk on the beach, hang out by the pool. We celebrate John and Jimmy's birthdays again with yummy cake from Publix and have lunch at the Olive Garden.
I love their chocolate covered fruits and ginger and fruit peels
Oh, yes, there was work too! Budgets and subscriptions to discuss and a whole ton of stuff that make our library world go round and round.
All too soon the week was up and we had to come home ... back to the reality of what was waiting. Sarah has not destroyed our house but she has broken the clothes dryer. I do another round of cleaning because soon I won't much feel like cleaning anything.
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Wearing Pink Again
When I was a teenager in the angst filled days of the 1970's my favorite colors were earth tone -- brown, green, blue (navy), and this apparently bothered my mother. I remember her telling me that I was young and that I should wear bright colors ... pink was the color she tried to hoist on me. But I was having none of that then!
Now I am embracing the pink. I've painted my toenails Avon Viva Pink. And I am hunting through my closet for pink items ... I am surprised that I have quite a number of things in varying shades of pink. I am sure that Sarah will claim she harangued me into buying them! Maybe she did a little ...
Mummy ... I know you see me. I know this is not what you wanted for me but I am wearing pink now!
Now I am embracing the pink. I've painted my toenails Avon Viva Pink. And I am hunting through my closet for pink items ... I am surprised that I have quite a number of things in varying shades of pink. I am sure that Sarah will claim she harangued me into buying them! Maybe she did a little ...
Mummy ... I know you see me. I know this is not what you wanted for me but I am wearing pink now!
Monday, February 14, 2011
Valentine's Day
We are at St. Mary's bright and early for my bloodwork and EKG. All goes well and we are done fairly quickly. There's even time for lunch since I don't have to be at work until noon ... yippee!
It's a weird Valentine's ... not that we ever do much with this commercial holiday except to exchange gifts and have a nice homecooked dinner. I hate going out on this day.
I get jewellery and John gets a homemade chocolate chip cookie dough cheesecake ... how fair is that? But that is what he wanted and it was made with lots of love.
It's a weird Valentine's ... not that we ever do much with this commercial holiday except to exchange gifts and have a nice homecooked dinner. I hate going out on this day.
I get jewellery and John gets a homemade chocolate chip cookie dough cheesecake ... how fair is that? But that is what he wanted and it was made with lots of love.
Monday, February 7, 2011
Surgery Date is Set
I have a surgery date ... it is March 1 at St. Mary's Hospital. I know all will go well. It is after all a hospital named for my Patron Saint!
There are all kinds of things to before that time. I have to stop taking my fishoil and flaxseed pills, and also all aspirin-based products except for Tylenol. My magic Aleve is out so I will have to remember to remove it from my purse.
On Feb. 14 I will have to go to St. Mary's for pre-op testing ... Happy Valentine's Day to me!
On Feb. 28 I will have to go back to Dr. de Paredes for a needle localization. I don't even want to think about this one. It involves inserting a wire into the breast to attach to the marker, so the surgeon will know which path to take. Sounds hideous!
At least now I know that I can attend the librarians meeting in West Palm Beach at the end of the month. I had really been looking forward to that. We haven't seen John's parents since August, 2010, when we were in LA for Michael and Andrea's wedding. It will be good to see everyone again.
There are all kinds of things to before that time. I have to stop taking my fishoil and flaxseed pills, and also all aspirin-based products except for Tylenol. My magic Aleve is out so I will have to remember to remove it from my purse.
On Feb. 14 I will have to go to St. Mary's for pre-op testing ... Happy Valentine's Day to me!
On Feb. 28 I will have to go back to Dr. de Paredes for a needle localization. I don't even want to think about this one. It involves inserting a wire into the breast to attach to the marker, so the surgeon will know which path to take. Sounds hideous!
At least now I know that I can attend the librarians meeting in West Palm Beach at the end of the month. I had really been looking forward to that. We haven't seen John's parents since August, 2010, when we were in LA for Michael and Andrea's wedding. It will be good to see everyone again.
Friday, February 4, 2011
Happy Birthday to Hubby!
I am glad that we get to celebrate John's birthday. I was a little afraid that something cancer-related would through a wrench in our plans. I've baked a marble cake with chocolate fudge frosting and dinner was at the Old Original Bookbinders (birthday boy's choice). A little bit of normalcy in a world gone crazy.
I would have thrown a party for this big birthday (50 is every reason to celebrate) but I know he doesn't feel like it. He is a gem, my hubby, and I would not trade him for the world.
I would have thrown a party for this big birthday (50 is every reason to celebrate) but I know he doesn't feel like it. He is a gem, my hubby, and I would not trade him for the world.
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
I Meet the Surgeon
There wasn't much on the web about Dr. George Knaysi but there's enough to know that he is considered one of the best in breast cancer surgery. I will not be getting a quack.
I meet the nurse practitioner first and I like her. And after a long while we meet Dr. Knaysi and I like him. I think he will do his best. There is talk of all kinds of radiation but I am opting for a traditional treatment. I don't want to have to mess with having a bulb inserted in me and emptying drains and all that. I am relieved when Dr. Knaysi says he doesn't think that I will be a good candidate for the bulb because of where the tumor is ... there will not be enough flesh between the tumor and the skin. I am fine with that. Having a lump cut out of you is bad enough, I do not then want a bulb inserted in me .... no ... no ... no.
It is really too early to tell what the treatment is going to be. No one knows the make up of this tumor yet, so we will have to wait until after surgery. Dr. Knaysi is all booked up till the end of February ... there is no chance of surgery taking place until the end of the month or early March. I am all right with that because I have so much to do.
Meals will have to be made and frozen. My house will have to be cleaned. My student worker looks at me when I tell her this and she says, "Really? I don't think your house will need much cleaning." She's right. I guess people do have a sense of who I am. But see, I have a plan.
I meet the nurse practitioner first and I like her. And after a long while we meet Dr. Knaysi and I like him. I think he will do his best. There is talk of all kinds of radiation but I am opting for a traditional treatment. I don't want to have to mess with having a bulb inserted in me and emptying drains and all that. I am relieved when Dr. Knaysi says he doesn't think that I will be a good candidate for the bulb because of where the tumor is ... there will not be enough flesh between the tumor and the skin. I am fine with that. Having a lump cut out of you is bad enough, I do not then want a bulb inserted in me .... no ... no ... no.
It is really too early to tell what the treatment is going to be. No one knows the make up of this tumor yet, so we will have to wait until after surgery. Dr. Knaysi is all booked up till the end of February ... there is no chance of surgery taking place until the end of the month or early March. I am all right with that because I have so much to do.
Meals will have to be made and frozen. My house will have to be cleaned. My student worker looks at me when I tell her this and she says, "Really? I don't think your house will need much cleaning." She's right. I guess people do have a sense of who I am. But see, I have a plan.
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